The Best Day of My Life
A very short story.
“John, I just had the best day of my life!” I said to my friend John.
“Oh my god, Mary, that’s amazing!” he said. “What happened!?”
“Just kidding,” I said. “It was normal.”
“Oh, okay,” he said.
“Gotcha,” I said.
November 17th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
The part i don’t get about this story is when the mummy jumps out of the grandfather clock. That part seemed too spooky to me.
November 22nd, 2009 at 4:52 pm
Ahhh your blog is really really good and I just spent an hour reading it and I don’t regret it
November 23rd, 2009 at 7:49 am
You have a good sense of humor, I think. But that doesn’t redeem the two big problems with these stories - the irony drenched tone and the length. Not, of course, that you couldn’t write really short effective stories, but true to their length, these stories don’t tackle much. In a sense, the subject matter is as short as the word count. The stories feel small because you don’t approach much thematically, and whatever themes you do suggest, you suggest with such a worldly-ironic voice that it’s hard to take them seriously at all. Which is, unfortunately, the ultimate feeling you experience after reading this blog for twenty minutes. For the first five, it’s a pleasure. For the next ten, it becomes a bit irritating. And for the last five, you get depressed and a bit disgusted. Each story is good for a chuckle at the deadpan presentation of ridiculous events, the deadpan satire of ‘embarrassing’ characters, the deadpan tone in which absurd dialogue is laid out, etc. But deadpan doesn’t go take you very far in the end. Are you satisfied with your stories amounting, in the end, to nothing more than a cheap laugh? Cause cheap laughs don’t really mean a whole lot. Don’t you want to aim your talent towards creating something that leaves me with more than a sarcastic taste in my mouth? You must feel some creative impulse - you can’t possibly feel wholly satisfied using it to whittle Brooklyn party jokes into ‘very short’ stories. So why not write ‘not quite as short’ stories that attempt to say something that doesn’t slip out of the corner of the mouth? You can’t be so insecure about your writing that you resort to irony out of defensiveness alone.
Apologies for the condescension. I’d be pissed if someone said that to me. But then, I don’t live in New York any more so I doubt it’ll ever be awkward in person.
November 23rd, 2009 at 1:41 pm
this message is for someone named TAYLOR COWdery
you don’t know Anything about edith like me and Cassie.
Anyway, we think you are the Dead pan.
Edith is our hero of the Stars.
Well, I’m done.
November 23rd, 2009 at 2:27 pm
I just think it’s funny, ’cause you’re (Taylor) all fancy and stuff about writing and then you don’t put an apostrophe before the word “Cause” when used as shorthand for “because.”
I don’t think Edith should listen to you until you amend that. Well actually she shouldn’t listen at all, as you see, her stories here are intended to be funny and ironic.
November 23rd, 2009 at 2:41 pm
“Don’t you want to aim your talent towards creating something that leaves me with more than a sarcastic taste in my mouth?”
Hahahahahahhahah
I’m sure everyone wants to help Taylor Cowdery get good tastes in his mouth because his unsolicited critiques are so helpful and he seems like such a nice guy.
November 24th, 2009 at 1:09 pm
Welcome to the interwebs, Taylor. We who dwell here like things short and witty and sarcastic. Our time is spent multi-tasking! We are like cute little ill-tempered rodents with freakishly fast metabolisms. We must consume (and sometimes create!) as much as we can, as quickly as possible.
Ok, I’ll stop talking for other people now.
When I want a novel, I go out and buy one; but for fast, free entertainment (and Edith’s blog is highly entertaining!) I visit blogs, places like Facebook and Twitter, and my personal guilty pleasure: the buffet of snippet-laden newsites that offer twice the taste with only half the calories. I do that because I need something to get me through, yet another, humdrum day. And I applaud anyone who can offer a little pick-me-up. This blog is top on my list. It always makes me smile.
But hey, I’m reasonable folk. I do realize the Taylors of the virtual world have an appetite too. I just think it’s a shame that after a meal they find the need to relieve themselves in public.
Anyway, Edith, forgive my poorly written intrusion. I love your stuff, keep up the good work!
November 24th, 2009 at 7:25 pm
Guys! Thank you for all your comments!
And I meant to respond way earlier to Taylor, but yeah, obviously I’m bummed you didn’t like the stories, but I understand! Definitely not for everyone. And to answer your question, yes, I am satisfied with super-short, one-note, one-joke stories that don’t tackle very much. I’m not really trying to Say Something on a larger scale. Cheap laughs are fine with me! Although I’m not even sure what separates a cheap laugh from a real laugh, so, yeah, laffs all around.
November 24th, 2009 at 9:52 pm
Dear Edith,
I don’t know what to say but I want to Say Something. I couldn’t Cope if you went Off the Air. Please keep your Show on. Please keep it on. Keep it on every station, please. We watch it. We will watch.
We are always Here.
And, there is another issue. You know-what-i-mean.
Love,
Us
November 26th, 2009 at 1:42 am
dear taylor.
i too am very sad that david foster wallace died. sigh. but reading edith’s blog makes me feel at least a little nicer than i would if i were still doing what i was doing before, which involves a feeling of mental stagnation and hopelessness and a feeling that i am going to reach my 40s without having accomplished anything i’m proud of. also laying in bed. so i mean there’s that. <3 u edith
love
anna
December 19th, 2009 at 2:57 pm
“Don’t you want to aim your talent towards creating something that leaves me with more than a sarcastic taste in my mouth?”
That’s disgusting, Edith. Don’t aim your talent there.
Respect a dead man’s wishes:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61_rPgitFmc&feature=player_embedded#